LOVE HURTS

Ke Huy Quan stars as Marvin Gable, a successful realtor within the Milwaukee market, who has turned over a new leaf since leaving his former life as a hitman behind. However, when previous love interest Rose (Ariana DeBose) re-enters his life, Marvin's past catches back up with him and he must decide whether or not to help his friend and former colleague Rose or if he enjoys his current life's trajectory more. The billing from the trailers has this coming off as some sort of fight feast and that is the major issue I had with the film. Outside of an early fight scene and the final act, there's not a lot in between. Despite the micro runtime of only 87 minutes, there isn't much else going on in between save for 2 other storylines involving a coworker of Marvin's and as assassin who's looking for him as well as Marvin's brother Knuckles (Daniel Wu) who wants him back in his old role. While I was curious what Quan could do as the star of a martial arts film, there wasn't enough action onscreen to appease my appetite. Although, some of the scenes did have a few "man that's gotta hurt" moments. Throw in the other 2 lacking storylines and this is just a poorly written mess. 5.5/10

HEART EYES

A serial killer known as HEK (heart eyes killer) stalks and kills couples only during a 24 hour period on Valentine's Day. The interesting twist is the killer moves from city-to-city, never staying long enough to be captured. This year he (or she) has chosen Seattle where advertising executive Ally (Olivia Holt) is fighting to salvage her job after being responsible for launching a poorly received ad campaign. Freelancer and wunderkind Jay Simmons (Mason Gooding) is brought in for damage control. The 2 attempt to rework the campaign, only to get mistaken for a couple and are now within HEK's crosshairs. Holt actually gives a strong, and at times b*tchy, performance while Gooding is there to provide the eye candy for the female gaze. He's polite and respectful but also comes across as too much of a pushover. The couple works well together and their chemistry is easily believable. The body count on this isn't too high and the film isn't overly grotesque either. I really liked the fact the killer strikes different cities as it just opens up the playing field that much more. To my surprise, the couple is supported by detectives Jeanette Shaw (Jordana Brewster) and Hobbs (Devon Sawa), both veterans of the horror genre who were missing from most of the marketing. It's a decent enough horror film that I had some fun with even though I'm still digesting the reveal. I wish this holiday could get better horror movies though as my favorite is still 1981's MY BLOODY VALENTINE. 6/10

SEPTEMBER 5

The tragic events from the XXth Olympiad from Munich, West Germany in 1972 follows an ABC sports broadcast team who quickly pivots to the real-time events happening within the Olympic village. Unfortunately, most of the audience is aware of the events surrounding this Olympiad; however, I'm truly puzzled at why this film was made in the first place. Not to be disrespectful to the real life characters who are portrayed here but as I was watching this film, I'm asking myself, "why was this even made?" The focus should be on those 11 innocent athletes whose lives were tragically taken from them by a group of terrorists. Was anybody outside of media personnel really clamoring for a movie to be made within the control room? My gut tells me no and this comes off vaguely as a sort of media propaganda piece in an attempt to perhaps sway the viewer to once again buy into the modern media since trust in them is at an all time low. A respectful piece dealing with a tragic subject matter but one who's point of view was not needed. 6/10

CAPTAIN AMERICA: BRAVE NEW WORLD

President Thaddeus Ross (Harrison Ford) attempts to mend bridges with Sam Wilson (Anthony Mackie) in an effort to reform the Avengers and to help secure a new, vital resource that's appeared on our planet: adamantium. However, Sidewinder (Giancarlo Esposito) and the Serpent Society have been hired by a mysterious buyer in order to kill President Ross. I'll be fully transparent that I was not looking forward to this movie for a few reasons. The first, 4th installments within the same franchise rarely are worth any type of quality and are a studio looking to continually cash in on the property. Secondly, it's extremely lazy and obvious to take an established character like Captain America and recast him with a minority actor. Not taking anything away from Mackie as I am a fan of his work but Marvel has so many characters in their library they could have easily introduced a new character or started another franchise rather than taking this route. And yes, I'm FULLY aware Wilson becomes Cap in the comics too but for theatrical purposes, they should have left him alone. If that's the case then can we recast T'Challa in the next Black Panther movie with a white actor? As for the movie itself, Marvel still isn't able to find its old magic formula. And while I'm glad they've slowed down the number of products they're churning out, superhero fatigue is real and I for one am at least worn out from it. Many of the same faults with recent Marvel movies are still on display: Mackie doesn't have the same presence as Cap as Chris Evans did, the storyline is thin while they barely move the needle for the next film in the MCU, and there's very little to get excited about in terms of the direction for this film or the MCU as a whole. Let's hope this summer's THE FANTASTIC FOUR: FIRST STEPS can bail them out otherwise they're really in trouble! 6/10

THE GORGE

American sniper Levi (Miles Teller) and Lithuanian sniper Drasa (Anya Taylor-Joy) occupy the west and east sides of a gorge respectfully. They are not to have any contact with the other while on this year long assignment. Their only mission is to guard and ensure what's inside of the gorge, does not reach the surface. Judging from the trailer it appears the story is built around this premise but it actually comes to the surface (pun intended) rather early in the story. The rest of the film unfolds with the what and why behind the need for people like Levi & Drasa. Originally this looked more like a horror film to me but turned out to be way more sci-fi as the story is rather out of left field but I just couldn't buy into it. I continue to love Taylor-Joy's work as she always comes off as authentic in any character she portrays and is once again stellar here. Teller continues his trope at an attempt of a modern day Gary Copper, you know, the "strong, silent type." I'm assuming they both signed on for this for the paycheck because the story isn't anything to write home about outside of the love story between the 2 characters. A film that showed promise but disintegrated upon its unfolding. 5.5/10

THE MONKEY

Twin brothers Hal & Bill (Theo James) stumble upon an organ grinder monkey that's left behind by their absent father (Adam Scott). They soon realize once the key on the back of the toy (don't ever call it that) is turned, someone soon dies under extenuating circumstances. Based upon a short story from Stephen King, writer/director Osgood Perkins follows up his LONGLEGS masterpiece with this over-the-top, dark comedy. The film is more funny than scary as the deaths are more in the vein of "WTF" while the comedy has dry but witty humor. It's dark and messed up in parts but the monkey itself is rather creepy. Unfortunately, Disney holds a copyright to a cymbals-welding monkey thanks to TOY STORY so the original Stephen King monkey had to change his tune to a drum, which still works absolutely fantastically for the picture. A minor edit but one worth mentioning. However, if folks like myself were hoping to be as blown away as they were from LONGLEGS they're in for a disappointment. The film overall is enjoyable but doesn't have the same quality as its predecessor. A third of the film shows the young twins stumbling upon the monkey while the rest plays out in current time. However, the ending and the reasons behind the carnage are understandable but also rather flimsy. I was hoping for more but maybe this'll grow on me in time and repeat viewings? 6/10

POPEYE'S REVENGE

The character of Popeye has now entered the public domain and with that, he's quickly treated to his own horror spin off. This one involves the house where Popeye lived and died, attempting to be reopened as a summer camp. However, with a new batch of unsuspecting visitors, Popeye can't help but greet them with a ripe welcome. The film shares many similarities with the FRIDAY THE 13th franchise except for quality. I knew exactly what I was getting into when I decided to watch this but even I didn't expect the amateur hour I sat through. The cast and crew are green. The effects and makeup are halfway decent and while I usually can laugh along by the shear absurdity of the story or at minimum gain some type of satisfaction from watching these films, this sadly has no redeeming qualities. It's not funny, it's not scary, it's a little gory but overall, just boring. 4/10

ZERO DAY (2025)

In this six-part Netflix series, unknown hackers briefly take down America's electrical grid, communications and transportation, then restore all--leaving a warning on every phone that it'll happen again. President Evelyn Mitchell (Angela Bassett) taps respected former president George Mullen (Robert DeNiro) to head a Zero Day Commission to investigate the incident and prevent it from happening again. Things get complicated--too complicated--right away because a Congressional oversight committee appointed by an overly ambitious Speaker (Matthew Modine) is headed by Mullen's daughter Jessica (Lizzy Caplan), and Mullens' right hand man Roger Carlson (Jesse a) isn't who he seems to be. But, then, no one else is, either. The first two episodes are gripping, but then the series degenerates into extraneous complications, probably added to keep the series going. The ending is ridiculous. DeNero reprises his Frank Sheeran persona from "The Irishman"--a doddering, mostly inarticulate senior--and Caplan has one expression--scared. The rest of the cast is ok. Not worth it.

Thanks for the review TB. The trailer did nothing for me so I skipped it. Glad to know I didn't miss anything.

THE LINE

Tom (Alex Wolff) is a sophomore at Sumpter College in Georgia and a fraternity brother of Kappa Nu Alpha. Initially his identity is tied to the fraternity, even someone who could be groomed one day to become President of the fraternity. The fraternity is known for churning out future Presidents and CEO's of Fortune 500 companies and Tom sees it as a way of gaining a leg up in the future. However, things come to ahead when pledge Gettys O'Brien (Austin Abrams) doesn't fit within the KNA culture. The film was completed in 2023 and was bounced around from gaining a theatrical release to finally a streaming one and I can understand the reasoning for the indecisiveness: the film drags and is quite dull. Even with a cast of young up-and-coming actors such as Wolff, Abrams, Angus Cloud, and Lewis Pullman, it isn't enough to make this anymore enjoyable. I was afraid from the trailer it would be yet another commentary on "toxic masculinity" but surprisingly it isn't. It deals more with family, brotherhood, and conformity. The trailer looked decent enough but unfortunately the final product didn't deliver. 5/10

You're welcome! Good decision.

THE RULE OF JENNY PEN

Taking place in the Royal Pine Mews Care Home (a New Zealand nursing home), Stefan Mortensen (Geoffrey Rush) plays a former judge who's suffered a stroke and needs round-the-clock care as he rehabilitates. However, this nursing home is unofficially run by fellow resident and Alzheimer's patient Dave Crealy (John Lithgow). During the night Dave psychologically (and sometimes physically) terrorizes his fellow residents to bend to his will while always reminding them his baby puppet (Jenny Pen), rules over them. I'm usually not one for psychological horror films as I'm more of a slasher fan but this was quite good. When you have two legends in Rush and Lithgow going at it, it's not a surprise to see such entertaining results. Lithgow especially is creepy and turning in some of his best work. Removing the eyes to Jenny Pen was a nice touch as well as it increases the creep factor as well. I haven't been a fan of movies released by Shudder in the past too and this was probably the best I've seen from them so shout out to them too for this quality film. Definitely worth a watch when it leaves the theater, which I'm predicting will have a short theatrical run. 6.5/10

QUEEN OF THE RING

A film chronicling the life and career of pioneer, female wrestler Mildred Burke (Emily Bett Rickards). Burke paved the way not only for female wrestlers but female athletes as a whole during the 1930's-1950's, during a time which women were found fulfilling more domesticating activities. Rickards is great all around. Physically the work she put in shows onscreen as she's in great shape and absolutely beautiful too. She's strong, empowering, confident in herself and her abilities, and a smart business woman. I've been a wrestling fan every since I can remember but I'll show my ignorance as I'd never heard of Burke before so this entire story was new to me. Surprisingly, this film was able to attract quite a cast of actors and wrestlers such as Martin Kove, Josh Lucas, Walton Goggins, Deborah Ann Woll, Jim Cornette, Toni Storm, and Kamille. It's a feel good story that plays like most sports film about an underdog overcoming the odds but it's not preachy or heavy-handed either. It doesn't insult the audience while still dealing with topics on race and sex. A solid film! 6/10