There are GREAT filmmakers that consistently make good and great damn movies into cinema around the world.

However, even the great ones fuck up sometimes. This column will explore some turkeys made by good directors. Let's explore!

DUNE (1984) - David Lynch

David Lynch is one of the more intriging figures of influence and force, a maverick with a cult personality upon film with such films as ELEPHANT MAN, BLUE VELVET, MULHOLLAND DRIVE, LOST HIGHWAY, and so on. Nevermind his popular if brief TWIN PEAKS television program.

After ELEPHANT MAN scored a truckload of Oscar nominations and critical raves, Lynch was brought onboard to the film adaptation of the legendary science fiction masterpiece novel DUNE of Frank Herbert's by Italian producer Dino DeLaurentiis. One wonders though where the creative and later trademarked Lynch-ian autuer work is, for honestly I can't seem to find it in this big-budget train wreck. Maybe Lynch was basically made Dino's patsy, or Lynch was WAY over his head, going from small budget features to a $50 million(or $100 million in today's money) picture, or something.

Lynch's DUNE is a movie that on one hand, Lynch is trying to work his magic, but on the other, the movie is trying to be like the epic LAWRENCE OF ARABIA of sci-fi film on the wake of STAR WARS. Either way fails on their own, and as a cohesive narrative, its a mess. Lynch reportedly assembled his true director's cut with the Theatrical edit, and then washed his hands of the whole affair. To this day, he refuses to speak about it, and honestly I don't blame him. On his LYNCH ON LYNCH book, which I recommend for both Lynch and movie fans, DUNE is the least-covered movie of his career, with Lynch mostly remarking about the sets. What does that tell you?

HOOK (1992) - Steven Spielberg

You know, this had the potential to be a winner. A whimsical adult fantasy about a father that finds out that not only did Peter Pan actually exist, but that HE is the gayest-looking children's literature hero out there.

Well, thats the only nice thing I'll say about it.

Why did this movie absolutely fail? Maybe Spielberg's trademarked whimsical approach fails to compute as the formula usually is expected to produce. Maybe he made the fatal flaw of letting Robin Williams being Robin Williams(a mistake that Barry Levinson paid dearly for in his TOYS flop from the same year), or that the "Lost Boys" look like a bunch of silly-ass "rad" punks. Okay, thats another good thing, for me to laugh at shit from the past that people thought was "cool"(I mean, skateboarding kids? )

Then again, maybe Spielberg gave us way too much sappy melodrama for us to digest, which in result made me wanna vomit, from the son who hates his father because he didn't attend the baseball games(yet the kid sucked in playing baseball. I don't blame the father actually!) to some stuff about the past....

Again, imagine if Spielberg didn't have Williams, the sap, and melodrama? Interestingly enough, Williams was a last-minute casting after Kevin Kline was forced to drop out. You know, he would have been good....but the movie was still fucked probably.

WHITE SQUALL (1996) - Ridley Scott

Sir Ridley Scott is one of the great visual storytellers of all time. But after flops in the 1980s like the masterpiece BLADE RUNNER, the pretty if unfortunately butchered LEGEND, and the undistinguished BLACK RAIN and SOMEONE TO WATCH OVER ME, his career was on the fritz. Save for THELMA & LOUISE, his career in the 1990s was, quite frankly, fucked.

WHITE SQUALL was his first movie after his decent 1492 picture.

However, if you thought I bitched about the melodrama in HOOK....please! SQUALL involved some lame adventure drama about some rich white kids in the 50s that go sailing, and then some bad shit happened. However, at that point, I was rooting for the kids to be exterminated.

To think that THE DUDE, Jeff Bridges, wasted his time with this failure of a movie...and Ridley Scott thankfully took time off after this and the quite awfully-bad-also G.I. JANE to recharge his creative batteries, then came GLADIATOR, that major hit movie that not only saved his career, but resurrected it artistically as well.

However, WHITE SQUALL should be avoided like a hurricane.

I nominate "The Outsiders" by Francis Ford Coppola.

'Ishtar'

By Warren Beatty

Correction, Elaine May was behind that ISHTAR turkey.

On a funny trivia note, did you all know that the $6 million paychecks that Hoffman and Beatty each received INDIVIDUALLY would have funded Oliver Stone's Oscar-winning PLATOON, which came out the same year?

Good column idea

Scorsese - Gangs of New York
De Palma - Snake Eyes (and a number of others)
Coens - The Ladykillers, Intolerable Cruelty

Am I the only one who thinks Gangs of New York, while not a great Scorsese film, is still actually good?

Am I the only one that likes this movie?!

Gangs of New York isn't just a good film, its a great film. I don't know why most people think Scorsese has sold out to Hollywood because he uses CGI in his films (not saying this is the reason MMTH thinks the film is bad).

Scorsese uses it when its necessary. Hell, he's one of the few directors out there that knows when and how to use it when its appropriate.

Gangs of New York gets a bad rap, and I honest to God don't know why.

Nope :p

I remember it as overlong, seemingly no clear storyline at parts, a bit over-dramatic and over-epic, and I wasn't a huge fan of Cameron Diaz.

It probably deserves a re-watch as its been maybe 3 years since I've seen it, but chances are I won't get around to it.

He also deserves credit for building a replica of 19th century New York in Cinecitta while that hack Lucas told him he could do it all on CGI.

GF3!

GONY sucks.

Hook should be taken off the list. RRA I don't know how old you are, there can't be too many years between us, or at what age you saw that movie but I was 10 and loved it at the time.

I love it. Though it has a weak ending.

I agree. This is one of the few Spielberg movies I really like.

Ah yes, the Nostalgia Defense.

I was 6, and sure I liked it at the time. I also liked ARMAGGEDON when I was 12, but again I matured, and realized that I ya my youthfulness clouded my judgment.

Besides Turi, what about the PC-friendly kids and all that garbage? Its like Spielberg's usual emotional manipulations are as apparent, as a car's hood ripped off, and we don't see a cool kickass Ferrari. No, we see instead the ugly, rusted, nasty looking engine parts, with oil and heat rising from it. That's HOOK to me.

If anything, I actually almost posted Spielberg's THE TERMINAL instead, but I'll do that in another column probably.

Funny enough, I figured Capo would post his thoughts on DUNE...but again, unless I'm mistaken, he ignores that blip on Lynch's career like most Lynch fans. I don't blame them.

As it should. I was explaining to a mate that because he's never seen the original Star Wars movies he wouldn't like them if he were to view them now - as I probably wouldn't. But if you grow up with something enjoying it you end up with fond memories. Hook reminds me of the cinema, or of Christmas with the family watching it at home and all those other cheesy moments.

Rufio! Rufio! Rufio!

I think Gangs Of New York is also a good movie Daniel Day Lewis plays a blinder as Bull the butcher only a couple of top actors would have been able to do a better job.....

Put my name on the "Likes Hook List"

Also I liked "White Squall" good little movie

I totally disagree....a good dark comedy, with a sensational Tom Hanks.

not a BAD movie really, but as with any Spielberg's movie, I got high expectations on it and was basically disappointed.

My pick is Family plot by Hitchcock. Or should I say A Countess from Hong Kong by Chaplin? Or E la nave va by Fellini?

You bet, we are spoilt for choice.

While I do consider them guilty pleasures, I liked both "Hook" and "White Squal." When I saw them both for the first time, I was aware of their poor reviews, so maybe I wasnt expecting much, and was therefore entertained. Although, I really didnt think the two films ("Hook" in particular) were that bad.

If a ten-year-old thinks Hook is the best film ever made, can he ever be wrong? I think he'd connect with the film a lot more than Ebert ever could. He'd understand it more, too. He'd understand it more than I would. And if that ten-year-old watched The Godfather and was bored by it, and consequently thought it was the worst film ever made, he wouldn't be wrong either.

I'd vote Munich as Spielberg's worst, from what I've seen.

Of others that have been nominated, I agree with Dune; and I never rated De Palma highly enough anyway.

Capo, thats a brilliant post of critical thinking. Touchee!(okay, Tip of Hat to ya! )

DePalma? Umm, I love him, but yes hes cooked a few turkeys himself....

I totally disagree....a good dark comedy, with a sensational Tom Hanks. [/b][/quote]Yes but compared to their other work, these two seem downright horrible, dont you agree?

It seemed like someone trying to imitate the Coens directed these pictures, not the Coens themselves.

What Spielberg films have you seen?

Duel
Jaws
Raiders of the Lost Ark
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Hook
Jurassic Park
Schindler’s List
Saving Private Ryan
A.I. Artificial Intelligence
Minority Report
War of the Worlds
Munich

Owned.

Why am I owned? I simply asked a question. I wasn't trying to be "cheeky." And to Capo, of the films you have listed, I would put Munich in front of Hook, A.I., Minority Report, and War of the Worlds. It's been quite a while since I saw the Indiana Jones trilogy, Jaws, Jurassic Park, and E.T. so I won't compare them. I haven't seen Duel yet. I also consider Munich a better film than Empire of the Sun, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, and maybe even Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

I think me and you have discussed Munich in the past, though I don't remember our arguments :p .

I first got into Dune with the David Lynch version. Read the books later. My thoughts: Dune conveyed the spirit of the story. The new Sci-Fi miniseries remake however, stayed way more true to the book, which is always a plus. However for good nostalgia, go with the 80's version. The Director's Cut, aka the "Alan Smithee" version if you can get ahold of it.

However if you don't understand the ideas behind the Dune Universe, YOU WILL GET LOST!

You have received a certificate of ownage because you asked Capo what he's seen from Spielberg as if he's seen only a few Spielberg films, and he basically rolled off alot of old Steve-O's career.