JACKASS NUMBER TWO
United States, 2006
U.S. Release Date: 9/22/2006
Runtime: 95 min.
MPAA Classification: R
Theatrical Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
Cast: Johnny Knoxville, Bam Margera, Steve-O, Chris Pontius, Ryan Dunn, Jason “Wee Man” Acuna, Preston Lacy, Dave England, Ehren McGhehey

Director: Jeff Tremaine
Screenplay: Sean Cliver & Preston Lacy
Cinematography: Dimitry Elyashkevich, Lance Bangs, & Rick Kosick
Original Score: Andrew W. K.
Studio: Paramount Pictures

I am assuming that you watched “Jackass: The Movie,” which humiliated and mutilated the boys to absolutely stunning box-office success in 2002. I am even taking a good solid guess that you giggled as “Jackass” ran for three seasons on MTV, pissing off legions of parents and political pundits. So, it is a half-half proposition that you are reading this review because you enjoyed their past exploits. To the others that hate ”Jackass,” please leave this review right now. Click off to see some pornography, or go read Thomas Luster’s latest 80’s garbage ninja movie review over at AndersonVision. Just buzz off.

Ok, are they gone? Good, break out the anti-septic cream.

The questions you all that want to ask about this sure-to-be Oscar nominated “Documentary”, I have quick-fire answers for you. (1) No, nobody dies. (2) Yes, a member of the “Jackass” crew has Crabs. (3) Yes, Steve-O still living with us denies God’s power over mortality. (4) If you need my answers, why haven’t you seen the movie yet?

Actually, the only question in regards to “Jackass: Number Two” that actually matters is, does this sequel compares with the first picture?

“Number Two” is more ambitious, even ballsier, and easily more prone to cause the squeamish to lose their lunch than the previous movie, and that film I figured was the extent of their sick and twisted imagination. In other words, I didn’t take into effect the indigestion of horse ejaculation or swimming with sharks with a hook pierced in one’s mouth. Pity me.

Yet, this film lacks as successful of a cohesive rocking and rolling narrative as “Jackass: The Movie” does. Instead, the troupe decided to try to be as fun and outrageous, without trying to actually out-top the heights of the first picture. They succeed in all accounts.

As I having quite a laughing blast with this “Number Two,” I noticed that despite Steve-O doing his best, the gutsiest member is the leader himself, Johnny Knoxville. A rocket stunt malfunctions, and he narrowly avoids having a good hole through his chest by inches. He laughs at this kiss of death, and attempts the same stunt again. A large python snake bites lots of holes into his arms. His head hits the pavement enough times to make me wonder how he can still speak coherently.

He mocks the existence at danger itself. He defiantly stands without face protection at a firing anti-riot land mine, even after seeing this device shred a paper cutout into bacon strips. Hell, he takes the stunt up after Dave “Cow Hockey Eater” England turned it down. Perhaps most fitting, Knoxville giggles, and puts on a blindfold, as a Yak then charges into him. Whatever he is one brave mother sucker, or an insanely stupid fool with a death wish, nobody can deny either.

Did anyone else get a good double-layered laugh when Bam Margera, a long-time torturer of Ryan Dunn, finally gets a good scare of a prank pulled on him, which caused him to emotionally break down? The guy has done enough nutty acts in the past to prevent me calling him a wussy, but there is something within this reviewer that makes me believe that justice was rightly served.

Sorry Bam, but there will be a third “Jackass” cinematic outing, if the opening weekend of “Number Two” is any indication.

Final Film Rating - ***1/2

I despise Jackass, and it's cast of stupid white boys. Especially one big stupid ass white boy, Steve-O. He is nasty and always walks around with his balls out, and has no attractive traits whatsoeva. Poo on Jackass, those jackasses!!!

Hmm, really don't see how them being white figures into the equation of how good or not good their stuff is, but ok...

"I yam what I yam!" - Popeye the Sailor Man

Hey, give Dave England and Chris Pontius credit. They love to swing their jingle bells around as well.

This will depress you, but Steve-O's father is the current President of NABISCO.

Just remember that the next time that you eat an OREO cookie, that you're helping Steve-O fund his next insanely stupid stunt, or his next death-inviting orgy of booze and marijuana.

Should the have black guys on Jackass? Or the stereotypical Indian sidekick?

Silly rabbit, white people are lame. Get with it.

.... Wow. That last one alone is grounds for a smacked bottom.

Oh, word, straight outta' compton. Now, if you excuse me, I'm late fo' my reservations out at the new Taco Bell. See ya' on da wess-side. Fo' rizzle!