A: Kramer to Jerry & Elaine

Q: "You killed Fredo!"

A: Jerry to Kramer
Q: It must have gotten lost in the mail

A: Newman to Kramer and all of Newman's postal buddies

Q: "You go ahead and keep her. But remember this - when you control the mail, you control...information!"

Newman to Jerry

"Yeah, Jellyfish, gotta watch out for those Jellyfish...."

A: George to Kramer regretting passing on a certain trip.

Q: "I'm king of the castle, baby!"

A: Jerry to Elaine
Q: I guess I just wasn't ready for the responsibilities of a pretend-marriage

Jerry to Meryl (or is it Monica!?!?!)

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that"

A: Kramer to Newman
Q: Give me a moan, something. I'd settle for a belch, for God's sake

A: Constanza to Seinfeld

Q: "Have you ever taken a bath in the dark? If I'm not talking into the soap right now, call me back."

A: Marlene to Jerry
Q: Oh, I'm looking right at you, Big Daddy

A: Kramer to Newman

Q: "Yes. And a more offensive spectacle I cannot recall."

A: Newman to Mrs. Seinfeld
Q: Street toughs took my armoire?

A: Elaine to Kramer

Q: "So long, jackass!"

A: Jerry to Lamar
Q: This is our best model, the Cougar 9000. It's the Rolls Royce of wheelchairs. This is like, you're almost glad to be handicapped

A: Wheelchair salesman to Kramer & George

Q: "She's got everything I ever wanted in another human being - except for the walking."

A: Kramer to Jerry
Q: You know, I've been issued a public urination pass by the city because of my condition. Unfortunately, my little brother ran out of the house with it this morning. Him and his friends are probably peeing all over the place

Jerry to the security guard

"I haven't vomited in 13 years."

A: Jerry to Elaine

Q: "You! Take off your socks, your pants, your underwear. We're doing the wash."

A: Kramer to Elaine
Q: C'mon relax. Just because they look alike that doesn't mean you're secretly in love with Jerry

A: Kramer to George

Q: "Excellent...excellent!"

A: Newman to Elaine
Q: Hey, I am not a prude, sweetheart. I swing with the best of them

A: George to Susan

Q: "Pulp can fly, baby!"

A: George to Jerry
Q: Because I'm refreshed! I finally found a way to sleep in my office. Under the desk! I lie on my back, I tuck in the chair. I'm invisible

George to Jerry

"Look, you wanna get hurt?"

A: Cedric the gay guy to Kramer before stealing the armoire.

Q: "You should hear the way my boyfriend talks to me."

A: Sharen to George
Q: If I could talk to the mothers and have sex with the daughters, then I'd really have something going

George to Jerry

I'd like to see that complaint rectified.

A: Mr. Peterman to Elaine
Q: Go fold your little balloon animals, Eric. Eric... What kind of name is that for a clown?

George to Eric (How can you call yourslf a clown if you've never heard of Bozo the Clown) the Clown

"Dating is really starting to get embarrasing isn't it?"

A: Jerry to Elaine

Q: "No. I need a really pretty face. But hey, that's me."