LADY IN THE WATER (2006) - **

Ladies and gentlemen, M. Night Shymalan has finally produced his HEAVEN'S GATE, his ONE FROM THE HEART, his 1941.

I mean he's made financial flop of a movie that people will usually cite, and all times as the punchline of some joke in Hollywood.

Shymalan seems to either have rapidly devoting fans, or many more that despise him. I'm neither. He's never done a real satisfactory movie for me, but hes done some nice ideas or shots that I dig. Though now I'm sure his ego has gotten ahold of him. Sometimes falling on your ass is good for you.

Yet ROBOT CHICKEN's slap against Shymalan is brilliant. "What a TWIIIIST!"

THE SIXTH SENSE was a pretty fun, if overrated, thriller. UNBREAKABLE was a great idea of a movie, if pooched by a script screaming to be rewritten 2-3 more times and an outright pathetic ending. SIGNS was preachy and at times ridiculous, but I still liked the basic geist of it.

Now THE VILLAGE, its not a bad movie. Its just not good either. It wants to be a mind-bending social commentary of a TWILIGHT ZONE episode. Its a nice ambition. Yet we knew Shymalan was going to pull a twist...and those with a functioning brain guessed it a hour at least before the finale.

But LADY IN THE WATER is just mediocre in its writing, direction, creative excercise, editing. The only thing that excels is Shymalan's ego.

Its a pity because Giammati is doing really good acting here. He will survive this. Maybe even Ron Howard's kid too, but its not certain for her.

Perhaps the biggest reason why LADY drowns is because its so...how I say...self-aware. A movie critic, to symbolize Shymalan's pissing on critics(usually those that hate him) and the monster movie formula. ZZZZZ At least Shane Black had the courtesy of making his Hollywood-pisser KISS KISS BANG BANG rather funny in the process.

But maybe the most annoying thing in LADY is Shymalan himself. His cameos in previous movies were in the tradition of Tarantino, Huston, Kevin Smith, Spike Lee, etc. Yet now, he plays a character thats destined, by Ron Howard's kid, to write a book that will earn world peace, but he will die because of it.

If that isn't hubris, then I need to boast my own arrogance.

Shymalan is lucky though. Warner Brothers had a bigger stinker of a financial disaster in the summer with POSEIDON. So Night can come back....but he can kiss his high amounts of money and creative control good bye.

"I see poor people!"

Just watched "Elvis & Me" story by Priscilla Presley.seen it about 10x over the years!
Beautiful love story such a shame.

The King just couldn't keep away from all the ladies.

nor all the bags of chips.

Or Fried Peanut Butter and Banana sandwiches...or this:

What the hell is that?

What I wonder now is, how did that fat fuck NOT die earlier from all that grease and cholesterol?

The fool's gold loaf...I'll barf if ya make me explain.

Yuck.

BTW, true fact: Elvis' favorite movie? DR. STRANGELOVE.

Kingdom of Heaven (Director's Cut) - (Ridley Scott;2005;UK/Spain/USA/Germany)
During Christian occupation of Jerusalem, a Knight returns to France to bring his son with him to the Holy land.
Seeing the director's cut is a completely different experience then the theatrical cut. Character motivations have the missing puzzles put it and some things are now noticed as a result of showing all the missing pieces that were cut "for time." At the same time it returns to the power of old Hollywood epics while retaining modern gritty realism. Superior to Gladiator and one of the best epics of the last half century and possibly further. While Orlando Bloom isn't the best choice as the protagonist, he works. It could've been better with someone else but it doesn't tear the movie apart. The story, acting, cast, direction, music, everything is top notch.


Crank - (Mark Neveldine/Brian Taylor;2006;UK/USA)
A hitman is drugged by his rival with an anti-adrenaline poison and must keep it up to live longer.
While some aspects of the style I liked, at times it quickly turns annoying at many times in that Man of Fire type of way. It does entertain though, mostly due to Jason Staham's presence. The main problem is the action is like Sin City only without the comic book atmosphere.

DV, glad I'm not the only to think possibly the restored edit of KINGDOM OF HEAVEN arguably makes one of the elite top 5 movies of 2005, if not the best...and probably Scott's best work since BLADE RUNNER.

That's exactly why I loved it

No, really?

In my best Dr. Evil impersonation, "really!"

I watched two films over the weekend: they couldn't have been more different, but I liked both.

Der Untergang (2004), aka The Downfall: Hitler and the End of the Third Reich . A German movie about the last days of Hitler in Berlin's bunker. I have no idea if this film has been released in the USA, however I strongly suggest everyone to watch it. Bruno Ganz's performance is pure genius.

In Her Shoes (2005), directed by Curtis Hanson (who shot L.A. confidential). A movie you may label as a chick flick, but it is indeed much more than that. It's a movie about family bonds, an intelligent, emotional, moving but not sappy film with first class performances. It brought a couple of smiles and a couple of tears to my face. Much more than most of contemporary movies usually do to me.

Lav, if you're interested, here are my thoughts on Downfall:

It looks like one of those new, crisp and suddenly popular TV dramas, too clean to be credible; it sounds like a muffled video game; it feels like a film set throughout, where, if the camera were to pan to the right at any moment, you may just see the rest of the cast fumbling about on set, ready for the next scene. Not even Ganz' sterling performance can lift it beyond its own claims of historical accuracy.

Most recent movie I have watched would probably be Next of Kin.

Thoughts?

I saw two films back-to-backon the big screen yesterday:

Apocalypto
Mel Gibson 2006 USA
Gibson's films are all seemingly based around the notion of life as freedom and death as slavery…or something like that. In order to show what is at stake in terms of freedom, in terms of life, he makes his films as gory as possible, so that when a character dies, he does not leave the world peacefully, but has his heart ripped out by an evil savage. For Apocalypto, Gibson has toned down the slow-motion that killed Passion and is more interested in getting one with events. If the events themselves are ludicrous, and we don't really care for any of these horrid people, then at least it has its moments of noteworthy action (the chase scenes through the forest are wonderful). And the scene in the middle of the movie, at the Mayan temple, shot in large amounts of dusty, sandy yellows and bright reds, with the captives being escorted to the top of the temple itself painted in blue, is wonderful and scary.

Babel
Alejandro González Iñárritu 2006 USA / Mexico
Less fragmented and more episodic than 21 Grams, and if it avoids the sags in interest found in Amores perros, it also fails to reach that film's emotional heights; it's probably because the familiar narrative technique isn't nearly as vital this time round - the novelty has worn off since the 2000 film, and it was vital to 21 Grams's meaning. Here, it's very solid without ever really needing to be present (other than perhaps to bind several events which happen to span several days into one consumable narrative), though an argument in defence might arise, and hopefully does, upon a second-viewing. Iñárritu confirms himself not only as an interesting artist, but also as an incredibly confident craftsman familiar with form and film language - his cutting between the various scenarios, and between various shots in those individual scenarios, is well controlled and effective; the first of these cuts between plot strands happens to involve children, as two brothers in Morocco scarper from the scene of a crime, and then a brother and sister run excitedly from their maid on a different continent; there is one moment where one character suffers a crescendo of screams as she lies in pain, and, just as we reach the peak in decibel, we cut to a POV of a deaf-mute in a completely different environment altogether; and the deaf-mute scenario offers the most interesting editing technique to produce meaning, in a Tokyo nightclub scene in which we cut between loud shots of drunken dancers and then to silent POVs as we watch on with only flickering lights. Great stuff. The scenes in Morocco are - or should be - the most tragically intended; the scenes in Tokyo the most aesthetically convincing; the scenes in Mexico the most arbitrary in view of the wider scope of the film; the scenes in Tazmarine the most emotionally intense. Also of note is the acting, and one of the performances in particular: it is often overlooked in Iñárritu's films because it is difficult to judge the pitch of an actor whose character's narrative arc is all out-of-sync, but Brad Pitt's effort here is very impressive indeed.

I thought Apocalypto was wonderful Capo (I think I gave it *** 1/2). It was also in my top 5 list of last year along with:

1) V for Vendetta
2) United 93
3) The Departed
4) Apocalypto

I've yet to see Babel but I am looking forward to it.

Buffalo '66 - (Vincent Gallo;1998;USA)
After a 5-year prison sentence for a crime he didn't commit, a man kidnaps a girl to pose as his wife to impress his parents.
One of the best films to come out in recent times. Gallo brilliantly shows a grotesque autobiographical character, only making him fascinating him with the layers of his troubled upbringing. Gallo's talent shines from his acting, direction, and musical compositions. It also manages to feel completely real. There's a scene where he runs to a bathroom to straighten his hair only to break down in tears with self-pity. While similar scenes have been used to rape emotion in other films, this scene is an example of one that rings true and some might even relate too. The focus of the film is mainly on Billy Brown's frustrated self-pity, which he covers with despicable manners that define him early on.

One of my all-time favorites.

Bravo Vercetti...I heard its good shit. I'll check it out this weekend.

Bottle Rocket **
(First Viewing)

Upon his release from a mental hospital following a breakdown, the directionless Anthony joins his friend Dignan (who seems far less sane than Anthony.) Dignan has hatched a hair brained scheme for an as-yet unspecified crime spree that somehow involves his former boss, the (supposedly) legendary Mr. Henry. With the help of their pathetic neighbor and pal Bob, Anthony and Dignan pull a job and hit the road, where Anthony finds love with motel maid Inez. When our boys finally hook up with Mr. Henry, the ensuing escapade turns out to be far from what anyone expected.

Brother Luke and Owen Wilson worked well together and it's a shame they don't get more films together. I've always liked Owen more than Luke and I thought Owen was the show stealer of this film. Both men were crazy and complete f*ck ups, but Owen was able to add some decent humor to the film. He seemed like an 8-year-old kid playing cops and robbers at some points. This was my first time I was exposed to Robert Musgrave's work. My favorite scene of his was when he discovered his brother was being arrested for being a drug distributor and he says to Anthony "Anthony, I need to talk to you, man... Anthony, I have got to talk to you! Look, I am sorry about this, this seems like a nice soiree, but I have got a family situation. I don't care what you think. I dont care! Tengo una situación con mi familia! Dignan does not want to deal with it, could you please come outside for a minute?"

Running With Scissors *
(First Viewing)

Young Augusten Burroughs (Cross) absorbs experiences that could make for a shocking memoir: the son of an alcoholic father (Baldwin) and an unstable mother (Bening), he's handed off to his mother's therapist, Dr. Finch (Cox), and spends his adolescent years as a member of Finch's bizarre extended family.

The events of this movie are ludicrous, and I didn't really care for any of the characters. The story at first seemed to be interesting and somewhat humerous, but that was quickly lost some 45 minutes into the picture. The movie kept going in and out, in and out between entertaining and boring. Alec Baldwin did a fine job with the amount of time he was in the film, as did Evan Rachel Wood and Annette Bening.

Kill Bill Volume 1 ****
(Nth Viewing)

"The Bride" was the deadliest assassin of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, until the day she decided to leave the business, assume a new identity, and get married. But it was on the day of her marriage that her old "friends" - O-Ren Ishii, Vernita Green, Budd, and Elle Driver, not to mention her boss, Bill - find her and assassinate the entire ceremony while Bill shoots her in the head, putting her in a coma. Well, Bill and his people should have tried a little harder because, after four years, the Bride has awakened from her coma. And Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Kill Bill Volume 2 ****
(Nth Viewing)

It all began when the nefarious Deadly Viper Assassination Squad moved in and assassinated the Plympton wedding party at the Two Pines Wedding Chapel in El Paso, TX. Well, all but one: The Bride, their real target. All they managed to do to her was put her in a coma. And four years later, she woke up and swore revenge on the lot of them. It began with the disposing of O-Ren Ishii/"Cottonmouth" and Vernita Green/"Copperhead". Now, the "Black Mamba" has only three left on her Death List: Budd/"Sidewinder", Bill's brother; Elle Driver/"California Mountain Snake", the deadly one-eyed assassin; and, of course, Bill/"Snake Charmer", her boss, teacher, and lover. However, Bill does possess one thing that keeps the ball in his court: B.B., the daughter the Bride thought she had lost in her coma. And now, at this point, the Bride knows only one thing: in the end, she will kill Bill.

I got to watch both of these movies as part of a dinner and a movie double feature at my local theater tonight. These movies have changed my life and are definitely some of my favorites in recent years (not to mention all-time as well). David Carradine knocked Daniel Day-Lewis out as my favorite movie villain of all-time as Bill. Personally, I felt it was a BIG slap in the face to Uma Thurman to not at least garner an Oscar nomination

Bah, David Carridine getting slapped out of an Oscar nom was more disgraceful.

I mean, a villain thats likeable, but deserves to die. That's not easy for an actor to pull off.

Besides Irish, you should know that great villains make the great heroes.

ALL THE PRESIDENT'S MEN (1976) - ****1/2

Howard Hunt, the infamous White House-employed burgular busted at the Watergate Hotel in 1972 (and launch a 2-year process that would lead in Nixon resigning) died the other day.

The discovered connection between "HH" and the White House by Washington Post reporters Woodward and Bernstein would also launch the great journalistic story of the 20th century. They would inspire a new generation to get their shoes and work hard for the truth...along with that same generation to do their best to find the "great story," whatever its there or not.

People will complain that the movie gets too intertwined with the massive amounts of information and having to keep in mind the developing connections that the reporters dig up. However, we are so entrenched within the mystery that when viewers may or may not get lost, the dramatic narrative keeps you going full-steam.

Flags of Our Fathers **
(First Viewing)

In February, 1945, one of the fiercest battles of the Pacific theater of World War II occurs on the tiny island of Iwo Jima. Thousands of Marines attack the stronghold maintained by thousands of Japanese, and the slaughter on both sides is horrific. Early in the battle, an American flag is raised atop the high point, Mount Suribachi, and a photograph of the raising becomes an American cause celebre. As a powerful inspiration to war-sick Americans, the photo becomes a symbol of the Allied cause. The three surviving flag raisers, Rene Gagnon, John Bradley, and Ira Hayes, are whisked back to civilization to help raise funds for the war effort. But the accolades for heroism heaped upon the three men are at odds with their own personal realizations that thousands of real heroes lie dead on Iwo Jima, and that their own contributions to the fight are only symbolic and not deserving of the singling out they are experiencing. Each of the three must come to terms with the honors, exploitation, and grief that they face simply for being in a photograph.

I felt this movie didn't take enough time to establish the characters. Six men raised the flag at The Battle of Iwo Jima and only 3 of them are followed (because the other 3 died). However, when the 3 who died were being discussed, I had no idea who was playing them in the movie because they didn't really build on their characters into well into the movie. By then, I didn't care about the characters anymore (as painful as that may be to write). This is not Clint Eastwood's best by far and Letters From Iwo Jima is looking better than this (and seems to have actually earned the Best Picture nomination over Flags of Our Fathers).

Unbelievable...I agree totally with you Irish.

If anything, melodramatics and scriptwriter/producer Paul Haggis are a recipe for one to avoid watching a movie.

If anything, Hollywood is still stuck in the SAVING PRIVATE RYAN-template of WW2 drama...visually and in melodramatic writing.

I have to say, I'm not surprised at all that FLAGS OF OUR FATHERS got jack on the awards circuit, while also being slaughtered on the beaches when it went to theatres.

HOLY SH*T! I thought for sure you or someone else would back this movie. I think that is the first time we are in "total" agreement

The Driller Killer **
(First Viewing)

In New York, painter Reno Miller (Abel Ferrara) shares a loft with his girlfriend Carol (Carolyn Marz), who left her husband Stephen, and their roommate Pamela (Baybi Day). Reno is having difficulties paying his bills, while he is obsessed painting his masterpiece, a buffalo with a hypnotic eye. When a punk band moves to his building playing day and night, Reno cannot sleep and is driven insane, going to the streets with a drill, killing homeless derelicts. When the art dealer calls his painting a mockery, and Carol returns to her husband, leaving him alone, Reno goes totally mad.

I thought Abel Ferrara did a fine job acting, as the insane painter Reno and a decent job directing. However, I have NO idea what writer Nicholas St. John was thinking when he wrote this screenplay. I'm not quite sure how this movie got made, based on its storyline. Again, it's like Snakes On A Plane or Bandidas, you know what you're getting from the title and it didn't disappoint. It was exactly as cheesy and bad as I expected it to be, but I did enjoy it. Luckily, both men were able to rebound in 1990 with King of New York. However, I only heard about this movie maybe a week ago because it's going to be remade. If that is the case, consider me there for that one. I'd be VERY interested to see how or even why this movie would be remade.