Earlier tonight at a party (at which I consumed no alcohol whatsoever ), this girl who I've talked to maybe 2 or 3 times in my life approached me and told me that I was the most unique person she's ever met.

It was really strange, but I cannot think of a bigger compliment.

Nice job DVC. Did the evening go well with you and the lady?

Well, it sort of went like this; most of the people at the party were in the basement having a beer pong tournament thingy. And since I think beer pong is just about the stupidest thing in the world, and I have to get up early for work tomorrow morning, I decided just to chill with a few other people upstairs and watch the Spurs-Jazz game.

We were sitting there watching the game, when April approached me with a cup of beer in her hand. She didn't really seem drunk yet though. She sat down next to me, and I knew she was staring at me, but I didn't really want to look at her though. I don't know, I think it's just really awkward for two people who have barely met to look directly at each other. Then she tapped me on the shoulder and started talking to me...

April: Hey...you...Mike George...

Me: Hey, watsup April

April: Has anybody ever told you that you're like, the most uniquest person in the world?

Me: Uh...no, nobody's ever told me that

April: Well, you are a very unique person

Me: Hahaha, why do you say that?

April: I don't know...like you look a normal kid and usually act like a normal kid, but sometimes when you let yourself go, you act so different from everyone else.

Me: [laughing] Really? Thank you, I guess.

April: Yeah. And also, in speech class, your speeches are so different from everyone else's too.

Me: How so?

April: Like, you seem so relaxed up there, and all of our speeches are like, really uptight and you can tell that we're reading or reciting something, but you're always so natural, and funny too! And all of your speeches are like, different from each other too. Me and Dayna were talking yesterday about how we always look forward to your speeches because we're in for something special!

Me: [laughing again] Wow April...thanks for the complimtents. I didn't...really expect that.

April: Yeah, well, *takes a sip of beer, you're like the most unique person ever.

Me: Thank you.

April: Well...se ya around! *she gets up and walks away

...

It was the strangest thing ever. Totally took me off-guard. I didn't even know how to respond. I only know this girl from my Speech class, and I've talked to her maybe twice before that.

I can't stop thinking about this for some reason. I felt like I was in a David Lynch movie or something.

That's great DVC

Call her and ask her out today, and if she remembers who the hell you are, I guarantee she'll say yes. Say you enjoyed talking with her last night, and would like to see her again.

By the way, you could have told her that the word unique, by definition, does not take qualifiers, such as "very" or "most", and there is no such word as "uniquest" as "unique" itself is a superlative, but why ruin the moment.

Good luck. It sounds as if she likes you.

I don't want to go out with her though.

Do a bit of the old "Hump and Dump" routine. Works for me.

All women are objects. As long as you remember that you'll be fine.

By the way, did that little lady in your film class get the stitches removed yet?

No...I haven't.

Well, you know what they say; "no means yes".

Hmm... My erection is actually bleeding right now. I'm not so sure what to make of that.

That's what I live by.

The first sissy that objects to Capo's brilliant pearl of wisdom is out of the He-Man Woman Hater's Club.

Man-Law.

And some women throw objects.

Yeah, like those who enter object-throwing events in athletics.

In fact, I find the whole notion of women in sports hilarious.

object throwing events!

I don't know what kind of weirdo "object throwing sports" you guys have over in the UK, but in America, the only role our women have in our object-throwing sports is as targets.

I must say, American archery really gets the blood pumping.

...out of the wounded flesh of our targets.

I know of at least 4 "object throwing" events at olympics - Javelin, Discus, Short putt and Hammer throw. The hammer throwing is the funniest of them to me for some unexplainable reason. I think olympics celebrates a lot of cave-manish games

Just go to a Scottish Games if you want to get a kick out of large burly men in kilts throwing heavy objects. Anyone ever seen a caber toss? Looks hilarious with a guy balancing a giant log straight up in the air, running forward with an "official" basically breathing down his neck as he runs right behind him to judge the toss of the log end over end to make sure it wasn't leaning to one side or the other blah blah blah. I may be wrong, but my vote goes to the Scottish for the most cave-manish events.

Haven't quite seen any tossing of women or women being used as targets though. I guess the Scots are confused by wearing womens clothes to begin with.

One event that always amused me was the biathalon, which blends cross-country skiing with rifle marksmanship. After skiing a considerable distance as quickly as possible, the participant must stop, control his heart rate to maintain a steady hand, and shoot at targets. I always thought that in order to make it more challenging, the athlete must knock down a shot of whiskey each time he stops to shoot.

I was bored last night and couldn't sleep, so I decided to make a list of the best albums for each year since 1963!

1963 Charles Mingus - The Black Saint and the Sinner Lady
1964 Bob Dylan - Another Side of Bob Dylan
1965 Bob Dylan - Highway 61 Revisted
1966 The Beatles - Revolver
1967 The Velvet Underground - The Velvet Underground and Nico
1968 Van Morrison - Astral Weeks
1969 The Beatles - Abbey Road
1970 The Stooges - Fun House
1971 Leonard Cohen - Songs of Love and Hate
1972 Can - Ege Bamyasi
1973 The Stooges - Raw Power
1974 Richard and Linda Thompson - I Want to See the Bright Lights Tonight
1975 Neil Young - Tonight's the Night
1976 Parliament - The Mothership Connection
1977 Parliament - Funkentelechy Vs The Placebo Syndrome
1978 Talking Heads - More Songs About Buildings and Food
1979 The Pop Group - Y
1980 Talking Heads - Remain in Light
1981 Glenn Branca - The Ascension
1982 Bad Brains - Bad Brains
1983 Sonic Youth - Confusion is Sex
1984 Minutemen - Double Nickels on the Dime
1985 The Smiths - Meat is Murder
1986 Sonic Youth - Evol
1987 Sonic Youth - Sister
1988 Sonic Youth - Daydream Nation
1989 Nirvana - Bleach
1990 Fugazi - Repeater
1991 The Jesus Lizard - Goat
1992 The Jesus Lizard - Liar
1993 Wu Tang Clan - Enter the Wu Tang Clan (36 Chambers)
1994 Nas - Illmatic
1995 Genius/Gza - Liquid Swords
1996 Dr Octagon - Dr Octagonecologyst
1997 Radiohead - OK Computer
1998 Boards of Canada - Music Has the Right to Children
1999 The Flaming Lips - The Soft Bulletin
2000 Radiohead - Kid A
2001 Bjork - Vespertine
2002 Interpol - Turn on the Bright Lights
2003 The White Stripes - Elephant
2004 The Fiery Furnaces - Blueberry Boat
2005 The National - Alligator
2006 Sonic Youth - Rather Ripped
2007 Arcade Fire - Neon Bible

yr dumb

Since when is there a 'b' in the word 'dumb'?

ur rite, my bad lol

YR DUM!

So, I tallied it up today, and a friend of mine who happens to be gay is beating me in masculinity.

He's huge on watching sports. I don't know a thing about sports, I don't watch them, I don't know the rules, and I can't physically play them.

I'm extremely obsessive compulsive. Diagnosed, actually. I'm unusually organized. Anytime he shows up to my house, any room we tread through becomes a mess.

I've been a vegetarian ever since I was six. Not that there is anything feminine about vegetarianism, it just seems like a lot of ignorant jock types obsessed with their own masculinity feel the need to put dead animals in their mouths.

And it keeps going. I'm the worlds gayest heterosexual without transcending into the exploitive realm of meterosexuals (which is such a stupid, elitest term) and he's probably the worlds straightest homosexual.

How queer.

LLC, are we long lost brothers? seriously, everything you just said, i could have written. (well, minus the vegetarian part.)

i'm diagnosed OCD as well - everytime i tell someone, "i'm obsessive compulsive," they think i mean i'm anal & neat; no, i'm diagnosed obsessive compulsive. since the term has come to mean - in a "slang" sense, i guess - that you're just neat & anal, you have to argue with people to convince them you've been diagnosed. kind of annoying.

not only that, but my entire family thinks i'm gay. everytime i have a girlfriend, i see it as my personal, private business (i keep my private life & my family life incredibly separate), so to their knowledge i've never been with a woman. i have an extreme lisp, i'm incredibly effeminate, i unconsciously get limp-wrist more than i care to admit, i have an obsession with oscar wilde, etc. etc. etc. i suffered bullying, beatings & rumors in school for it - i think you & i should be having the contest.

I take the cake in femininity. I talk with my hands like I'm about to go milk a twelve-breasted cow. I'm really, really skinny (about 5'10" and only 120-130 pounds) so this makes me weak and unable to participate in sports... But I'm really not interested in sports anyways. Like I said, I'm Obsessive Compulsive, but lately I've been suspecting that it might be a symptom of autism... I read up on Autism lately, and everytime the article listed an example or symptom of Autism I thought "oh god, I do that..." Some of them were really specific too, like always putting my socks on before I put my pants on. I don't know why I do this, I just always have. I don't like the way it feels to be sockless in general though... It's very bizarre, and makes me feel uncomfortable.

But, that aside, I've always been secretive with girlfriends too. Not so much secretive, I just don't feel the need to tell someone unless they ask me if I have a girlfriend. But I think this just stems from being shy or nervous with girls, which I am... Sort of like, I have trouble asking a girl out, so I have trouble communicating it to a third party... A family member no less.

And I'm very liberal minded and accepting to that sort of thing, so it could through people off, but I don't think there is anyone who actually believes I'm gay. People just regard me as social awkward and maybe a bit nerdy (Because, you know... Star Wars is just way cooler than football).

I drive a big truck, lift weights, play linebacker, eat steak with my bare hands, and shoot squirrels in my backyard just for the hell of it.

Growl.

talking with my hands? i'm 100% italian - tell me about it. i've been asked if i know sign language numerous times.

like i said, the socially (sexually) awkward bit, criminally shy, impossibly nervous, obsessive compulsive, secretive with woman, etc. etc. etc. - it sounds like i could have written what you just wrote.

it's just taken to a higher level with me because so many people - by just my mannerisms & my demeanor - automatically assume (note: they don't ask) that i'm gay, my family included. it's equal parts frustrating & hilarious.

I used to be asked if I were gay. Not so much anymore. People have come to the conclusion that I'm just demented and on every drug imaginable.

But, that's the thing about me. Depending on the setting and who's present, I'll either be incredibly hyperactive and obnoxious and lively and hold no boundaries or I'll be very shy and anxious. Both are very socially awkward, it's just half of the time I don't give a fuck, and the other half I'm reduced to nerves. It's a complex behavior.

It stems from OCD, mainly. I'm very energetic and humorous, but if things don't go my way, I become melancholy quite quickly.