True enough. But Michael's attempt to separate the two (as in GFII--"Senator, we're both part of the same hypocrisy. But never think it has anything to do with my family") was yet another of his self-deceptive (and unsuccessful) attempts at overcontrol--to rationalize his own criminal nature. That very night, his fantasy collided with reality when his bedroom was machine-gunned. The look that Kay gave him afterward, while holding Mary on the couch, said it all.
And Kay nailed it but good in III, when she and Michael had their confrontation at his party. Michael bellows that "I spent my life protecting my family from the horrors of this world." And Kay replies, "But you became my horror." Perfecto, Kay!