It could be an Italian version.... "IL Padrino in Peoria".

Two seeing eye dogs. '

Man, wouldn't it be great if he did a play. I'd love to see it.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!! That is great SC!!!!! LMAO



TIS

I don't know why that was funny to me. Maybe the curiosity as to what you PMed her. I keep returning to the notion of compromising photographs of yourself.

I think I'm finally feeling low enough to finish writing the horribly depressing novel I started writing over a year ago.

I don't completely mind. I'll be glad to finish it; the writing is some of my finest, I think. Very unconventional... abrasive. I've adopted the phrase "experimental writing." It's like, if E.E. Cummings were to write a novel. Lots of experimentation with word forms, sentence structures, decomposition... I like it.

I just may as well be doing something active if I'm going to mope around a seasonal insomnia.

Scandal?!

(OMG, T/O/P lol)

Curiosity killed the cat.

Compromising photo's of myself? Not quite. But you'd be shocked if I told you who they actually were of. You'd be extremely shocked. But don't be too shocked Mr. C, because it's strictly business, not personal.

A friend, who I haven't spoken to in a while, was "walking his dog" through a graveyard two weeks ago, and a gravestone fell on his foot and took his big toe off! Like, I mean clean off. Got rushed to the hospital, where they re-attached his toe to the foot, and for a week or so they were waiting round to see if it would take to his body again. At one point things looked fine if a little distorted, with the blood flowing through. But two days ago, a day before he was due home, the toe died, and they had to permanently remove it. What makes this worse is that he's a very, very promising long-distance runner; of all the things to lose, and he loses something integral to his would-be career. Needless to say, he's devastated. I feel so very bad for him, it's unbelievable. I don't know if I believe that he was (just) walking his dog when it happened, but even so, what a freak accident, a tragic one no less.

(You should have seen the pictures. They were pretty bad, as you can expect.)

Sorry to hear that, Mick.

What are the fucking odds? That's like a piano player or an artist losing a thumb, God forbid.

Be sure to keep his spirits up.

I know. Firstly, of all the graves in a graveyard to fall down. Secondly, of all the people in the world who could have been in the graveyard. Thirdly, of all the places he could have been in that graveyard at that time.

Between you and I, I suspect foul play; in fact I think it was pre-meditated: rumour has it that the gravestone had been planning it for days.

His spirits are oddly high, actually; they were after he came out of the hospital yesterday, at least, despite the trauma he felt immediately after the news that he was a toe down. He was joking about it, even, saying that at least he had nine toes left. But I suspect it's one of those things that'll hit him a coupla weeks later if it doesn't in a few days.

A gravestone!

As my favorite columnist, Dave Barry, would say, I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.

Fucking weird!

Wow, that's terrible. It must have been pretty devastating news for your friend Mick. What a shame.

As bad as it is (to lose a toe) it could've been worse... it'd be too bad if he loses his running career, but he can, at least, walk and do other things.

Still, thats a freaky thing!!

I don't quite remember posting this one. Appy polly oggies.

My life is getting real boring lately. Seems like the same thing everyday. Hopefully things will change when I see Dylan.

Ever try snorting heroin off of an Asian hooker's chest?

I gotta go water my tomato plants.

As long as you don't have a 3 year old grandson to join you.

Yeah. Overrated.

Only boring people get bored. Sorry to break that news to you.

I wish I weren't too lazy to find the post where you went on about how bored you were with life, Mr. de la Cosa Nostra.

I've never understood people's obsession with material goods. Most guys in my school are completely consumed by what kind of car they drive, what type of sound system they have, how big the speakers are, rims, videogame consoles, clothes, jewelry, shoes, cell phones, iPods, etc. It seems to me that a lot of people buy things simply for the purpose of having them, not for the enjoyment one can get from using the product. People seem happier with the fact that they have an iPod than they are with the music they play on it. Same thing with videogame consoles.

Get used to that. It changes from iPods and cell phones to BMWs and jacuzzis and the size of your house.

Ever try an Asian hooker's chest after she snorts heroin?

It all has to do with keeping up with the Joneses. We see our neighbor with the built in pool or jacuzzi or his BMW. We have to compete. I love the commercials where it's Christmas time and two neighbors are competing to see who can have the biggest and grandest yard decorations. My favorite is this guy who has the big house; pool; acres of land and the announcer asks how he does it. He says, "I'm in debt up to my eyeballs. Somebody help me". I think about that when I'm in New York and wonder how some can afford to live such a lifestyle. Then I think how stressful their 60 hour work week is. I'll see a person with a cane, bald spot and bags under bags and realize he's probably about 35. If and when my daughter ever moves out on her own I'm sure 65 percent of the things in my house are hers. I'll be happy to live in a small condo. I'll sleep on a sofa bed. You just push the mattress back in the sofa and you're bed's made. Having all that bling bling just means you have a bigger credit card debt.

Ever try snorting heroin after an Asian hooker?

Nah. I'm not into, nor was I ever into, babania.

Hookers? Well that's another story.

I've never been much for heroin either; now, powderizing and snorting Asian hookers... That's what I call a Tuesday.

It's too bad about the toe. It's even more terrible a tragedy in light of his talent in running. It was strange that you mentioned this because on Thursday I was involved in a legal case where the claimant lost his four fingers on the left hand (he is left hand dominant) in a meat slicer. He was an artist, who apparently co-owned an art gallery in the Dominican Republic. He'll never paint again.

The high spirits of your friend are seemingly peculiar, but his reaction is not all that uncommon. I've dealt with quite a few cases involving amputations, and doctors have explained that frequently a cheerful psychological reaction follows a loss of digit or limb. It seems misplaced to an unattached Observer (no pun intended), but I'm told that the peculiar upbeat mood is the mind's way of healing the lost member. I've had cases where the insurance company covering the loss of the finger/hand was so put off by the cheerfulness of the claimant that they volunteered to pay for psychiatric treatment. It's really strange.

My vacation is over. How depressing.

Oh well. I owe. I owe. So off to work I go.