You just gave me an idea for a separate thread.

Meh, our park has seen so many playoff games, it's time we let some of the vultures have their shot at the proverbial corpse.

DING*DING*DING*

We got a winner! The funniest post of the year.

Boy, those grapes are sour.

Anyone else think the absence of Roger Clemens - both in person and on the highlight reel- was conspicuous?

It was less than a year and a half ago, the stadium was whipped into an orgasmic frenzy when he stood arm in arm with Steinbrenner and announced that he was coming back to pitch a half season with the Yankees.

Was it the Mitchell Report? Heck, Pettitte and Giambi were featured in it and they were treated like kings.

Petitte and Giambi have been somewhat contrite. Clemens has been the same defiant jerk he's been his whole life. I really think that's all there is to it. It's just as well; Clemens might have been a distraction on this great night.

Hell, I'm not even a Yankee fan, but I'm a New Yorker (more specifically, a Bronx guy), and a baseball fanatic. I've seen Yankee Stadium with my own eyes (be it on the Major Deegan on the way to work, or attending a couple of games a year when a good visiting team is in town), basically every day of my life. When it's no longer the first thing I see when I get south of the Cross Bronx every day, it's going to be quite a shock to my system. As it was, last night's ceremony got me very emotional.

Yankee Stadium is part of Americana; not just baseball, not just New York City. It is, pardon the cliche, truly the end of an era.

Not as conspicuous as the complete absence of both Joe Torre and Don Mattingly...

So, hope springs eternal. Boston lost last night. The Yankees didn't play. Mathematically, it's still POSSIBLE for the Yankees to get the Wild Card. It's not PROBABLE, it's not even realistic, but it would be so exciting if it came down to those three games in Boston this weekend.

They have other commitments gearing up for the postseason. Remember the postseason?

I didn't realize divorcing your drunk wife counts as the "postseason." Care to share Mattingly's key steps to preparation?

I didn't realize divorcing your drunk wife counts as the "postseason." Care to share Mattingly's key steps to preparation? [/quote]

Wow, how soon they turn on Donnie Baseball. It's funny that a reference to Stevie Swindal's drunken escapade behind the wheel at 2 AM (I didn't even mention the alleged mistress) that coincided with his divorce brought a reprimand of "everyone makes mistakes."

To answer your inquiry, I can not explain the steps to Mattingly's preparation to make the playoffs, but I would suppose it would resemble those of similarly situated hitting coaches in mlb.

Actually, it wasn't so much turning on Mattingly as I didn't realize he was an active hitting coach; I thought he had resigned for the year because of "family issues."

Ah, well, and so it ends. Anyway, nice win for Moose.

There's always next year.

It's funny, as much as I don't like the Yankees, I feel weird going into the playoffs without them there.

I'm a bit speechless actually.

First time in 13 or 14 years. It IS strange.

He's been the only real bright spot besides Joba with Wang out. Let's hope he gets #20. He's certainly put in the effort.

Maybe he was the only bright spot for YOU, but Jeter's always a bright spot for me.

Seriously, they interviewed Jeter last night. This is the first time in his career that the team haven't secured a spot, and the reporter asked him how it felt. His response (and I'm paraphrasing): It sucks, but we sucked.

Jeter did not have a very good year this year. I'm hoping he's not on the accelerated decline. With Posada the Albatross stuck to us for another 3 years, and Ghey-Rod for another 9, it's going to suck if the captain can't get back in the swing.

Honestly though, I think he's going to have to get with Girardi and take some Dale Carnegie courses. These guys looked like shit at times, and I'm not sure if the Jeter ala Torre approach of "awe shucks" is working anymore with this group. It's like they were waiting for the big turnaround like last year that never came. Too complacent.

I'm not sure what everyone thinks of Hank Steinbrenner, but Ray Ratto has an entertaining column. Of particular interest is his Godfather analogy.

Hank's Yankee whine tasting crowns week of absurdities
Sep. 24, 2008
By Ray Ratto
CBSSports.com Columnist
Tell Ray your opinion!



In a week that is only half over and already weirder than weird, it is hard for a body to know where to turn.


George Steinbrenner at least kept the blame inside the organization unlike son Hank. (Getty Images)
The Lane Kiffin story is now verging on the Favrian -- told and overtold. Omar Minaya's four-year extension in the face of another potential tanking is a classic what's-the-hurry tale. The rumor out of Australia that suggests that Lance Armstrong might be part of a group that may buy the organization that runs the Tour de France is either too cruelly ironic or too amusing to believe. The O.J. memorabilia trial has its own warm moments as you struggle to find a rooting interest.

But then you have the Yankees out of the playoffs, and the self-consciously overwrought reactions from the uniformed personnel. And then you have Hank Steinbrenner ... as always.

While the other Yankees complained only of psychic nausea and crippling emptiness, the team's designated gasbag decided to rail against his enemies -- namely, the existence of other teams.

In a pity party held through the auspices of Pete Abraham's Sporting News column, Steinbrenner surveyed the soot at his feet as he held forth on a number of topics near and dear to his pancreas. Like revenue sharing.

"That's a system I don't particularly like. It's a socialist system, and I don't agree with it. Does it work? It depends on your point of view. But is it right? Is it even American? I'd argue no on both of those points."

So the Yankees are out of the playoffs because of socialism. Check.

Now to the divisional structure itself.

"The biggest problem is the divisional setup in Major League Baseball. I didn't like it in the 1970s, and I hate it now. Baseball went to a multidivisional setup to create more races, rivalries and excitement. But it isn't fair. You see it this season, with plenty of people in the media pointing out that Joe Torre and the Dodgers are going to the playoffs while we're not. This is by no means a knock on Torre -- let me make that clear -- but look at the division they're in. If L.A. were in the A.L. East, it wouldn't be in the playoff discussion. The A.L. East is never weak."

So the Yankees are out of the playoffs because Major League Baseball isn't one 30-team division. Interestingly, this morning the Yankees would be tied for the eighth and final spot with Milwaukee, which presumably would be disqualified on the basis of being Milwaukee.

And then there are the playoffs, period.

"Go back to the 2006 season. St. Louis winning the World Series -- that was ridiculous. The Cardinals won their division with 83 wins -- two fewer than the Phillies, who missed the postseason. People will say the Cardinals were the best team because they won the World Series. Well, no, they weren't. They just got hot at the right time. They didn't even belong in the playoffs. And neither does a team from the N.L. West this season."

So the Yankees are out of the playoffs because the playoffs are stupid and a violation of the divine right of kings, or something like that.

Now in some places this preening "we're great because we're us" argument plays. Say, like in and around the Bronx. But in the wake of the Yankees' first non-October in 15 years, the last guy to snivel about the system is Hank Steinbrenner. I mean, he didn't like the playoff system as a teenager, and that's supposed to be a compelling reason to disband it?

Even his dad, who could complain in outer space, always found a way to delegate blame within his employee lists. As near as we can tell, Hank believes that he was first screwed by the decision to expand to San Diego, Montreal, Kansas City and Seattle in 1969.

Basically, there is an art to bitching in defeat, and Steinbrenner doesn't have it. Like many sons of privilege, he sees the world in terms of "I'm on third base, and I'm just waiting for the limo to pull up and take me home." Mark Cuban, who is often mocked for his intermittent tantrums, knows how to bitch -- thought-provoking and entertaining at the same time -- but Hank just sounds like an old guy on a park bench who wishes the Austro-Hungarian Empire had never dissolved.

This is sad in a 51-year-old man, to be nostalgic about times he barely remembered. Frankly, he'd look more dignified if he sued someone.

But he'll learn, because at some point his father will call him over and give him some pointers on how to be a sore loser. It'll be kind of like the Vito-meets-Michael-in-the-garden-to-plot-the-killing-of-the-heads-of-the-five-families scene in The Godfather. Right now, Hank is more Fredo than he is willing to admit, and bordering on outright Connie. If he keeps this up, Hal is likely to decide to be Michael, and we know how the movie ended for Fredo and Connie.

In the meantime, though, the ungrateful and disrespectful swine that is baseball goes on despite Hank Steinbrenner's earnest entreaties, and of all the hilarious nonsense so far this week, this one takes the lead at the top of the stretch. The field is crowded, though, and you never know when the Raiders might have another press conference.

Ray Ratto is a columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle.

I love Hank. He says most of the shit none of the other owners are willing to say in such a PC/diplomatic era. He says the revenue sharing is crap - and in some perspectives, it is. He says the two leagues are totally unequal - they are. And he says that it's not necessarily the best team but rather the hottest team who wins the world series - also true.

Sorry, DJ. You're a great kid, but Hank Steinbrenner is an asshole. His father's arrogance was endearing, because it was original and it was real. Junior's is contrived and not the least bit entertaining.

The idea of Torre playing the Red Sox in the World Series (while the Yanks watch from home), is eating him alive.

Oh, the hot team winning the World Series? Well, duh! It's always been that way.

Hank may be an asshole, but he's OUR asshole.

Even if Torre makes it to the World Series, I don't think any of the NL teams can stand against the competition from the AL this year.

Like the Cardinals two years ago?

The Tigers did, and do, suck my left nut.

Fox Sports: A-Rod Will Be Traded Within 5 Years

We can only hope.

Thanks. I'll never get that two seconds of my life back.

If wishing only made it so. His knickers are totally twisted over Torre making the playoffs. Hee!!!

That is the exact impression I get. His comment about it not being fair that Torre and the Dodgers are going to the playoffs because their division isn't as competitive is childish, at best.

But true.