A man is walking through the streets at two o'clock in the morning....A policeman stops him and enquires where he's going.
'I'm going to attend a lecture on the evils of drink and its effect on the human body.'
'Who would be giving such a lecture at this time of night?' asks the policeman.
'My wife!' he replies.
"After all, we are not communists"
Christopher Moltisanti: You ever think what a coincidence it is that Lou Gehrig died of Lou Gehrig's disease?
Tony Soprano: Yeah well, when you're married, you'll understand the importance of fresh produce.
| 
