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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65925
06/06/05 03:47 PM
06/06/05 03:47 PM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,602 Yunkai
afsaneh77
Mother of Dragons
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Mother of Dragons

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,602
Yunkai
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The 10 Dumbest Criminals
RUNNER-UP #9 Yankton, South Dakota: A woman was arrested at her step son's Boy Scout meeting. While watching a policeman demonstrate his drug dog's ability, the dog found a bag of grass in her purse.
RUNNER-UP #8 Colorado Springs: A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but he refused and said "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because he didn't believe him. At this point the robber took his drivers license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over, and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put the scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.
RUNNER-UP #7 A woman was reporting her car as stolen, and mentioned that there was a car phone in it. The policeman taking the report called the phone and told the guy that answered that he had read the ad in the newspaper and wanted to buy the car. They arranged to meet, and the thief was arrested.
RUNNER-UP #6 San Francisco: A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the branch and wrote "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to Wells Fargo. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he was not the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said "OK" and left. The Wells Fargo teller then called the police who arrested the man a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.
RUNNER-UP #5 From England: A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for 40 Pounds and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of 40 Pounds. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture...of handcuffs. The motorist promptly sent the money for the fine.
RUNNER-UP #4 Drug Possession Defendant Christopher Jansen, on trial in March in Pontiac, Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant. The prosecutor said the officer didn't need a warrant because a "bulge" in Christopher's jacket could have been a gun. "Nonsense," said Christopher, who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day in court. He handed it over so the judge could see it. The judge discovered a packet of cocaine in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five minute recess to compose himself.
RUNNER-UP #3 Oklahoma City: Dennis Newton was on trial for the armed robbery of a convenience store in district court when he fired his lawyer. Assistant district attorney Larry Jones said Newton, 47, was doing a fair job of defending himself until the store manager testified that Newton was the robber. Newton jumped up, accused the woman of lying and then said, "I should of blown your (expletive) head off." The defendant paused, then quickly added, "If I'd been the one that was there." The jury took 20 minutes to convict Newton and recommended a 30-year sentence.
RUNNER-UP #2 Detroit: R.C. Gaitlan, 21, walked up to two patrol officers who were showing their squad car computer felon-location equipment to children in a Detroit neighborhood. When he asked how the system worked, the officer asked him for identification. Gaitlan gave them his drivers license, they entered it into the computer, and moments later they arrested Gaitlan because information on the screen showed Gaitlan was wanted for a two-year-old armed robbery in St. Louis, Missouri.
RUNNER-UP #1 Another from Detroit: A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
THE WINNER! A Charlotte, NC, man having purchased a case of very rare, very expensive cigars, insured them against fire among other things. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of cigars and without having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the man stated the cigars were lost "in a series of small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion. The man sued....and won. In delivering the ruling the judge agreeing that the claim was frivolous, stated nevertheless that the man held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure against fire, without defining what it considered to be "unacceptable fire," and was obligated to pay the claim. Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid the man $15,000 for the rare cigars he lost in "the fires." After the man cashed the check, however, the company had him arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the man was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000 fine.
"Fire cannot kill a dragon." -Daenerys Targaryen, Game of Thrones
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65931
06/07/05 03:29 AM
06/07/05 03:29 AM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032 Texas
ginaitaliangirl
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
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I'm having my wisdom teeth removed tomorrow! ![[Linked Image]](http://www.gangsterbb.net/emoticons/hugegrin.gif) Since midnight tonight (or last night, technically), I'm not allowed to eat or drink, and it's driving me nuts. I filled up beforehand, but my mouth is dry...figures I'd get extremely thirsty only when I can't have it. The only thing I'm somewhat anxious about is the IV/needle or whatever they use to put me to sleep, because it'll be the only thing I'm conscious for. Hopefully. I'm curious to see what the whole drugged up/unconscious thing feels like, and I'm sure I'll be a mess when it's over, but I'll find the humor in it, surely. 
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65934
06/07/05 03:57 AM
06/07/05 03:57 AM
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 12,543 Gateshead, UK
Capo de La Cosa Nostra
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Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 12,543
Gateshead, UK
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Originally posted by Turi Giuliano: Did you guys know you can get any photo you want transfered onto a cake of your choice nowadays? The clarity is better than my printer. I've never actually seen it until today at work.
Unbelievable. I mean, how big must the feeder trays be to load in the cakes? I know. Last year we had one for me sporting my lovely garden pea biceps. Mick
...dot com bold typeface rhetoric. You go clickety click and get your head split. 'The hell you look like on a message board Discussing whether or not the Brother is hardcore?
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65939
06/07/05 04:47 AM
06/07/05 04:47 AM
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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,206 Los Angeles
Letizia B.
Underboss
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Underboss
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,206
Los Angeles
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I always thought December was the last month, but now you confused me... I'm not sure; I'll find out for you. Wisdom teeth... well I don't mean to scare you, but here's what they do. Once you're out, they cut open the gums to get to the teeth-- Afsaneh's right about that part. But then they shatter the tooth with a little hammer-like thing in order to take it out piece by piece. Then they stitch you back up and give you painkillers. I'm supposed to get mine out soon too. The thought of being completely knocked out scares me, so I asked if local anesthesia would do the trick; like if I can be awake but still numb enough not to feel anything. He said, "Sure, you can stay awake... if the noises won't bother you." So I asked what noises, and he explained the whole hammer-breaking-the-tooth thing with the piece-by-piece extraction. I'm putting it off as long as I can, but when the time comes, I've definitely given up the "awake" idea. Good luck though, Gigi! I hope you won't be in a lot of pain, and that your recovery will be quick.
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65940
06/07/05 04:54 AM
06/07/05 04:54 AM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032 Texas
ginaitaliangirl
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
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You know, I'm finding more and more that I must not pay attention much, because the dentist actually explained that, Zia, and I completely forgot.  I asked my mom if I could keep the teeth...if I were really mean, I would send them to my good friend who's having hers out soon, too. But I won't. Yes, I don't think I'd want to hear the noises, either.  I just feel awkward being with strangers and not knowing what's going on. You never know! heh Anywho, thanks to you and Afs for the support and kind words.  I figured it'd be a funny thing to talk about, and I might have commentary tomorrow. 
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65943
06/07/05 12:32 PM
06/07/05 12:32 PM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032 Texas
ginaitaliangirl
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
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Well, I did it. The teeth are gone. It wasn't bad at all. The doctor was very soothing, and I think he gave me more assurance than I ever needed. I was already sleepy, because I stayed up late last night chatting on here, so it didn't take long for me to get knocked out.  It was so weird; it was like I was dreaming, because I was aware of people around me (though at some points, it was like they were people I knew, friends and family...I must've been dreaming!), yet I was still very relaxed. The original IV in my vein wasn't bad at all, and he said that was the worst part...which turned out to be true. Zia, I wouldn't be worried at all if/when you get it done. The only thing that sucks now, is I feel and talk like Brando. I did have gauze in my mouth, but my tongue was so dry, and I was so desperate for water (none since midnight last night), that I finally got to take it out. But now, my lips and even my chin are still dead and feeling bloated. My mom called me a chipmunk.  I tried a Godfather line, but I can't even get my words out, so it didn't sound much like Vito. 
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65944
06/07/05 12:37 PM
06/07/05 12:37 PM
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032 Texas
ginaitaliangirl
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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 5,032
Texas
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Originally posted by Partagas: Gina: I had all four of my wisdom teeth removed when I was about 19 or so. Mine were impacted so I had to go to an oral surgeon. When the dentist first mentioned I had to see an oral surgeon I was excited .
Don't worry -- no problems at all. It will be cool "going under". When you wake up you will feel like you are drunk (not that I would know what that feels like ).
Seriously, I had no problems at all. The only pain I had was when the drugs wore off -- so stay stocked up!
Good luck!!!! I just missed your post, Part! Can you explain what "impacted" means? In reference to teeth...  ? I was cracking up half the time. Beforehand, they had me hooked up to all these monitors for blood pressure, pulse, etc., and I was trying different things such as holding my breath, staying still, moving around in the seat, and so on, to see what would change. Then after, they were pushing me in a wheelchair, and I kept asking (or tried to ask) for water, and then I'd just crack up at how funny my lips and mouth felt, and how I couldn't say anything. Probably my funniest trip to the dentist. I'd like to "go under" again...sure was relaxing and quite a "joy ride." 
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Re: Random Post Whoring
#65948
06/07/05 01:57 PM
06/07/05 01:57 PM
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300 New York
Sicilian Babe
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Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 17,300
New York
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Originally posted by ginaitaliangirl: Originally posted by afsaneh77: [b] That doesn't sound bad at all!  I'm glad it turned out just fine! You are my hero! Yeah, I do like to talk like Brando, but I feel like I don't even have "control" of my mouth, so it's weird circumstances. Thanks Afs! [/b]My husband had all four wisdom teeth pulled when he was about 27. When he first woke up from the drugs, he immediately started scratching under his chin and doing Brando. It was very funny. Glad it went well for you. By the way, my niece had the photo cake for her 16th birthday. It was very pretty, but a little weird when you had to cut the cake.
President Emeritus of the Neal Pulcawer Fan Club
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