I think of it like this. I don't know anything NJ. But, if you were to put the entire Soprano family somewhere in Los Angeles, would any street gangs fear them? Highly unlikely ! Why would they? A small crime family can only do so much, and if you're a street gang member or thug, you're already used to having enemies and people out to kill you all the time, so why extra fear for a small Mob group?

That's how I thought of it in the show. They're showing that yes, these guys are deadly criminals. Murders, in fact. But theres limits to their power and reach. And what they're willing to risk. Ultimately they were mostly all out for themselves and making money, not getting into beefs and wars just for the sake of looking tough.