*sound of wheelchair squeaking*

You know why they call me Tick?

*man cries in agony*

It ain't cos of my johnson.

*man moans "please God help me. Anything but this."*

Cos I'm hung like planet Pluto.

*man tries to make a run for it*

Unzip my pants, guys.

*bodyguards force mans head towards Tick's genitalia*

Most of me may be dead but my dick is standing at full attention. That's it, suck it real slow. No sudden moves. That's real good.

*distressed wretching sounds*

You gonna pay what you owe?

*man gurgles yes through mouthful of decrepit Italian sausage*